I started preparing for the 2020 Bar examinations. I reflected on my study habits, attitude, disposition and the way I presented my answers. I contemplated on those things that caused me distractions and shut them off such as social media, chit chatting with friends and I even blocked all of them on my phone so they can’t contact me. I redeemed myself and let go all the pains, frustrations and failures. I isolated myself for almost two years and just focused on my goals. I even neglected my family in order to achieve my dream to become a lawyer. I focused on my mindset and looked into my strategy. I submitted to mentoring system. Buying new books were my ceremonial start-refresh button as well. I studied smart, not hard. Finally, I tried not to pressure myself and just enjoy the journey. I took advantage of my good days by reading good books and review materials while I did not study on my bad days. I prayed every day. I have my daily devotion and I posted every bible verse I read on the wall of my room. I prayed a lot. The review was the most grueling part of becoming a lawyer. It was complete self-isolation as I study better when I am alone, with nobody and nothing around me but my books. Before starting to read I prayed for peace of mind. I went to sleep at 10 o’clock in the evening and woke up at 3 o’clock in the morning. I took a break for an hour or two during the day. A nap, YouTube and music occupied those day breaks. I listened mostly to instrumental music because it calmed and relaxed my mind. When I was reviewing, I lost all concept of time. Get up, take a bath, eat breakfast, study, eat lunch, study some more, freak out sometimes about how little time I have to squeeze the immense amount of law into my brain, cry a little, study some more, eat dinner, study, go to bed, get up, REPEAT. I studied a lot but I made sure I enjoyed doing it.
Few days before the exam, I cried many times because of pressure and exhaustion. I prayed fervently before every exam.

Again, the feeling of self-doubt creeped in. I asked God: “If my efforts still aren’t enough, I’m sorry. Lord, will I ever become a lawyer? But if you want to be a lawyer, you should not only aspire for it. You should want it more than anything else because God has His own way of surprising us. And fortunately, I was able to finish the bar exam with my sanity intact and thrive.